Contrary to popular opinion, I believe in the need for children to have an extensive break when the days are long, and the weather provides opportunity to be outside. Their minds and bodies absolutely need it.
But, for working parents, it is the most challenging period. The pressure to achieve the elusive work life balance creates significant stress. It puts strain on relationships, parents get frustrated with each other, for some single parents it is all on them. Grandparents get annoyed that their retirement is a return to parenthood with less energy and patience. You only see friends to juggle kids. Relationships are tested. Finances are stretched. And then there’s the horrific guilt, the fear that we screw up and our children are the unfortunate consequence of doing so.
Born in the 70’s, an 80’s child, I grew up on a street full of families. We’d be straight out of bed and onto the street the minute the sun peaked through our curtains, and we stayed out until the stars sparkled. The doors were open all day, a parent there if needed. For many of my peers today, we feel lucky to have lived such an experience, but this unfortunately fuels the guilt we all feel as parents.
The owner of a wedding planning business, the Summer is my busiest period. Throw in being a Founder of a start-up business and other ‘working’ commitments, I don’t help myself by thinking I’m a ‘stay at home Mam!’ The reality is, I’m not. I’m travelling with work, so is the Husband and we have no support to lighten the load. Planning, months in advance, is the only way I’ve found we can navigate the summer holidays.
Every situation is different so there’s no magical formula. As I write, my house is full of kids, only two are mine! They have decided to bake so I’m surround by absolute chaos.
I’m writing, trying to talk to you, in between the noise of kids talking over the top of one another and at me! Once the sugar hits, the walls won’t contain them, we’ll need to hit the park, they’ll play and fight and whinge, and I’ll find a bench and sit with my laptop to work. Embracing the chaos. And whilst I take work into their space, I also bring them into my workspace. My children are experienced wedding stylists and on an entrepreneurial journey. As they’ve grown, they’ve become more involved. They experience fulfilling a task and being rewarded ‘getting paid.’ My eldest joined me for his school work experience recently, we travelled and worked together on a celebrity wedding. He was absolutely amazing and has continued as a valuable member of the team throughout the Summer. I feel immensely proud to work alongside him.
We are all grateful for Summer Clubs but not all day, everyday. So, they’ll join me for meetings. When they were younger, I’d go armed with activities and food, now, they absorb the meeting, they provide me with feedback, they are curious and ask questions, all of which helps me and Kind Currency. Being a parent it’s a huge part of me as an entrepreneur. There is no miracle solution.
As you read this, structure will have returned, we’ll look back and realise we didn’t do too bad! Our frustrations will have melted away, the tiredness, the meltdowns, the mistakes, all forgotten, and the guilt quietened. Most importantly, when our children are asked if they enjoyed the holidays, they’ll smile with joy. Be kind to yourself and smile too!