The Reality Of Modern Boarding

Boarding schools conjure up a number of images in the mind.

For some, they are places of cold showers, dormitories of beds in rows, hard and unyielding. For others, they are a Harry Potter-esque world, with Hogwarts-style halls and mysterious rituals. To others still, they are bastions of privilege, continuing the Victorian tradition of preparing young men to lead in the far corners of empire and young women to be wives and mothers. The reality of modern boarding is very different from any of these stereotypes, though I confess to the occasional Hogwartian architectural flourish. For a start, the accommodation is far removed from that enjoyed or endured by Tom Brown in his schooldays.

Private rooms, ensuite bathrooms and state of the art leisure facilities are not uncommon in some schools; in more modest boarding houses the feel is very much like a bedroom that a boy or girl may have at home. At my school, staff work hard to create a family feel in the houses, with pizza nights, X boxes and birthday parties a regular occurrence. It’s not hard to see why many of our younger boarders describe it as an extended sleepover.

Boarding also has another darker reputational challenge. Reports of bullying, fagging and in some cases much worse surface in the press occasionally and few boarding schools do not have an unblemished record in this area. Boarding can be seen as somehow unloving, with boys and girls “sent away” for weeks at a time without seeing parents. Again, nothing could be further from the truth of modern boarding. Most schools now operate a flexible boarding system, where pupils can stay from one or two nights a week up to weekly boarding, where they arrive on Monday and leave on Friday or Saturday. For busy parents or those with long working hours, flexible boarding offers them the best of both worlds. The stress of daily pickups or emergency childcare is removed (and a night in a boarding house can be cheaper than a babysitter!) and parents can then spend quality time with their children at the weekends. In reality, most boarders live close to their school, usually no more than an hour’s drive or train ride away, and it is easy for parents to visit and watch them play fixtures or perform in a school concert.

There is much more to boarding though than just convenience. Boarding is a way of life, not just for the pupils, but for the school. A school that is a place where people live as well as work is a hugely rich environment and the experience it can offer is unique. Boarding is about learning to live as part of a community. Boarding teaches pupils to be tolerant and respectful of each other; when you live with someone you develop an understanding and appreciation of others hat is hard to match in a day school. Boarders develop confidence in themselves they genuinely do feel like they are part of an extended family, with brothers or sisters aplenty, mixing across the ages and stages and making friends which will stay with them for the rest of their lives. Boarding is not what you might think. If you as a parent have never been inside a boarding school or seen a boarding house then you should visit one when they next have an open day. I am sure you will be pleasantly surprised by what you see and hear from the youngsters who are living the experience.