To be or to do - that is the question.
A few years ago, during a coaching development session, we were asked: “Are you being coach or doing coach?”
The question hung in the air. I remember exchanging confused glances with another – neither of us knew what it meant. But we answered, and in doing so, we stumbled upon the essence of leadership.
What does it mean to be a “Being” Leader?
When dealing with people, responding to challenges, and handling stress, we often fall into two camps: “doing” people and “being” people.
The Doing People
Doing people get on with tasks for various reasons:
To block out distractions or stress.
To keep moving forward as a coping mechanism.
To achieve, ticking off tasks as a measure of success.
They focus on output, productivity, and measurable results. But often, the work they prioritize isn’t the most important – it’s just what keeps them busy. This busyness can lead to burnout, neglecting relationships, and missing out on what truly matters. In a world that glorifies being busy, doing people wear their effort like a badge of honour, but it isn’t always the answer.
The Being People
Being people take a different approach. They question why things are done, considering the bigger picture and the long-term impact. They focus on:
Understanding behaviour and psychology.
Being clear on their purpose, identity, and role.
Playing the long gamedeveloping people and creating sustainable success.
Being people know how to show up to influence their environment positively. They reflect on their actions, understand their impact, and hold up the mirror not just for themselves but for others as well.
So what does this then look like in the workplace?
Approach 1: The Doing Leaders
Doing leaders drive teams forward, focusing on success, competition, and achievement. Their priority is getting results, often without reflecting on how they got there. They concentrate on objectives, KPIs, and outputs but may overlook the impact on team culture, morale, and long-term sustainability. They are great at making things happen, but what if they leave? Will the team and organisation have the skills and capability to sustain without them?
Approach 2: The Being Leaders
Being leaders play the long game. They recognize that true success requires:
Investing in people, capability and role modelling the right behaviours.
Creating an environment that fosters development, psychological safety and collaboration
Encouraging self-awareness and accountability.
They build teams that can sustain success beyond their own tenure. This approach requires patience, self-reflection, and the willingness to challenge the status quo. It also demands that leaders leave their ego at the door – focusing not on personal recognition but on long-term impact.
My Own Leadership Journey
I didn’t realize I was a being leader until much later. I wasn’t interested in quick fixes. Sure, I could “do,” but I always did it with intention. When leading teams, I focused on building capability, aligning with values, and fostering independence. This wasn’t always popularit took time, and time isn’t always available in business. But I knew the long game worked, as people continued to develop without me.
I spend my time working with leaders on behaviour, recognising that how they present themselves can transform their impact on their teams and organizations.
Consider your own approach:
What systems shaped you?
What habits have you formed?
What gets in your way?
How do you need to be your best self for your family, friends, and team?
Start noticing when you’re “doing” and ask yourself why. Recognize the power of “being” and embrace the leadership style that fosters true, lasting impact.
Annabel is an Executive and Team Coach, Leadership Facilitator and Coach Supervisor. If you would like to explore what’s next for your development Contact Annabel via LinkedIn, annabel@successfultraining.co.uk, or visit www.successfultraining.co.uk