The impossible task of treating your children equally.
Liam and Noel, Harry and William, Kim and Kourtney, Cain and Abel. Strange bedfellows indeed – but they all share a common issue: sibling rivalry.
Any parent with more than one child can probably testify to the fact that it starts at a young age, whether it be counting out the Christmas presents to make sure everyone has the same amount or comparing bikes, hockey sticks and tennis rackets to check that they are the ‘same’.
As children become adults, the concept of treating them equally becomes a little more complicated than just measuring out their drinks and cutting chocolate bars in half. If not done correctly, it can not only cause distress and estrangement but also protracted and expensive legal issues.
Especially if you’ve “helped out” one child more financially than another in your lifetime.
So what can you do to avoid this happening?
We’re not here to tell you how to parent (or go into the psychology of sibling rivalry), but from a legal standpoint, there are some things you can put in place to address potential issues at the outset.
It’s a common misconception that parents are required to treat their children equally in their Will. In fact, unlike some other places, we don’t have forced heirship in this country. But let’s assume that you are planning on including your children in your Will.
If you feel like you need to level the playing field, perhaps because one child has received more financial assistance during their life than the other, you might want to consider the inclusion of a hotchpot clause in your Will.
Adding the hotchpot clause to the Will would consider the financial help one child received during the testator’s lifetime. This would ensure that that child would not benefit twice under the Will to the detriment of the other children.
The added benefit of a hotchpot clause is that once it is drafted into the Will, there is no need to update the Will every time a gift is made.
The only thing the testator will need to do is keep a record of the gifts made.
Similarly, in addition to the hotchpot clause, if a parent leaves money to a child in their Will but then, after making their Will, gifts money to that child, then the money could be treated as an advance on the child’s inheritance and deducted from what they are to receive after the parent dies.
Of course, parents treat their children differently because they are different and have different needs – so perhaps all this talk of equality between children is overthinking it.
Fairness doesn’t always mean equality; you will have the best insight into how it’s achieved for your family. Just don’t model your parenting style on Adam and Eve (it didn’t end well).
If you’re concerned with the division of your estate, contact Muckle LLP’s private client team on 0191 211 7863 or email advice@muckle-llp.com