This is a question I often get asked when I tell people I work with that I often use a coach or a mentor myself. Most people aren't quite clear why they ask this question (I always check). Some of the reasons seem to come from the fact I am their coach (why would a coach need a coach?), or I help them find answers themselves (so why would I need help to find my own answers).
The truth is, I believe everyone benefits from coaching (and mentoring) as it helps you take a different view, challenges your way of thinking, and gives you and different perspectives on a situation.
Its like the time someone who was coaching me was able to show me that working and coaching others can actually give you energy (I had mentioned that I often found really deep, transformative coaching sessions could be very tiring). When I looked at coaching slightly differently and used this approach, I found I would come out of even the most challenging coaching session as a coach with lots more energy. Up until that point. I just assumed that a really deep coaching session would leave me tired.
One of the reasons I use a coach is I know I can’t see all of the angles on my own. I carry my own biases, assumptions and I have my own way of problem solving and idea creation. This means it can be almost impossible for me to coach myself (as an example how I do ask a question to myself I don’t normally ask?). A great coach can help you get beyond all these barriers (your own bias, assumptions, and processes) to give you a fresh perspective and help you find new creative ways of working or a different solution to a problem you couldn’t see. It’s like when a close friend can see an issue or a solution that you sometimes just can’t. How invaluable is this different perspective and how insightful can these different questions be? One client gave me some feedback to say:
“(Nevil) asks very insightful questions, challenges without causing offence and managed to tackle every barrier that I had put in my own way! (Even the ones I’d hoped he hadn’t noticed!) One of the other reasons people ask that first question is they have a slightly skewed view on what coaching is and how coaching works (these are people who I’m not currently coaching). They may have experienced “coaching” in the past and this view of coaching may resonate with you. They (and perhaps you) have had that one to one time with a senior manager where they have told you what you did wrong or told you exactly what they wanted you to do. Now, these two approaches have merit in certain circumstances, but they aren’t what I would call coaching. For me a coach can be challenging, and can highlight gaps in knowledge, thinking or approach, and they will help the person they are coaching fill these gaps themselves. They open up new ideas and help people see things that they might not have noticed before. I have experienced and been fortunate enough to help a number of people experience quite big “aha!” moments. These moments where you suddenly realise a situation isn’t a challenge, it’s an opportunity. Or when you realise that your behaviour in a certain setting is having a hugely positive (and unfortunately, sometimes a negative) effect on your team around you. Or when you realise that something you are doing is holding you back from achieving your own goals. Another client put it this way: “I’m confident it will change my life. I now have self-belief, something I’ve been looking for for years” If you haven’t experienced professional coaching, I encourage you to go and speak to a coach, to find out what they do and how they add value.
If you are really curious about coaching, then have a look at our introduction to coaching course (its an online course with a number of free lessons) to give you an insight into what goes into becoming a coach (there is lots more there than most people appreciate). Coaching can be challenging and rewarding as a coach, and as the person being being coached. The vast majority of people find coaching to be a positive benefit in their personal and professional lives.
Which leaves us with one final question: You don’t need coaching do you?
