Whilst I applaud the current openness and debate about the real presence of mental health in modern life, a lot of mental health problems are in reality, reasonable people reacting to unreasonable or unique pressures, rather than some pathology.
Entrepreneurial isolation would fit into this category. The term, is used interchangeably with entrepreneurial loneliness (perhaps a more accurate description) and is often raised in general business conversation and also comes up in membership organisations. We know from research within the general population that isolation can have serious physical and mental impacts, ranging from sleep disturbance, reduced enjoyment of life, through to paranoia and depression. There is considerable evidence that loneliness increases morbidity (a person’s susceptibility to illness) and can even shorten lifespans.
Loneliness is frequently seen as ‘part and parcel’ of the entrepreneurial journey, perhaps because it is tacitly accepted as part of the process of aspiring to more where ”go-it-alone” is celebrated as a virtue, rather than a counterfactual. Entrepreneurial activity usually takes place in conditions where associations are ‘situationally created’ by the nature of your business, and you must remain constantly savvy to the calibre and conduct of confederates, colleagues, and competitors. It is an environment wherein even the most collaborative of endeavours are held together with a balance of partnership and caution. The truth is being an entrepreneur puts you into a relatively rare demographic. Most people are in employment, most people are generally risk averse, whereas entrepreneurial science positively correlates with the success that often comes with greater levels of risk taking. If successful and the risk/reward ratio is high this renders one even more rare in the community. Conversely if unsuccessful you are often left to suffer in splendid isolation.
It is quite interesting over the years that every time I have tried to run workshops on this subject everybody acknowledges it, signs up for it and then late cancellations come in. It is like the elephant in the room that no one wants to admit to applying to them. Sharing ones isolation, the fact that it is difficult to cope sometimes and like any other human being, entrepreneurs are not inured to despair at times is something acknowledged, but rarely explored.
Many Gedanken clients address this in a one to one, but there are many ways to alleviate that sense that you are alone, the buck stops with you and remove the sense that these feelings are something to do with your own personal pathology rather than a social process. Here are a few:
-Acknowledge that during those hard, go it alone times when they present, you are human after all and these are normal;
-Find a friend, colleague, coach, mentor or counsellor to talk about these issues ”offline”, recognising these dialogues are not just about how you do business but the way you do business;
-Network with groups that can offer more than just business referral, whether it is a business association, a professional grouping etc., putting a bit of time in here can make a difference in terms of increasing a sense of belonging and recognising common experiences;
-Avoid alcohol. Whatever issues you are facing, research shows that alcohol just makes it worse. Alcohol amplifies emotions and if yours are ones of loneliness then you can wind up feeling like you are on a rock somewhere. It messes with your sleep too so there is no escape;
-Re-examine the work-life balance. Celebrate and augment what gives you energy. Share with the people you love rather than maintaining an image of ”mover and shaker”, ”coper”, ”father of the house”, ”strong emancipated woman”, or whatever. These social masks just give the wrong message to people who could truly support us and we sit in isolation behind them.
In common with all human experience, the entrepreneurial journey is an emotional one, with its highs, lows and consequences on minds and bodies that have been millions of years in evolution. We simply can’t dismiss feelings with concepts and buzzy positive mind-sets alone. We need selfawareness, self-compassion and active connection to others to support us on our journey. My door is always open for those who wish to take the first step